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If SPRING IS HERE, Why Are You Out In The Cold?

That’s right it is spring, why are you out in the cold? 

Or let me be more clear, and ask you why do you keep putting yourself last?

Now let's take it a one step more,  for some of us I must ask, why are you basically making yourself a martyr when you don’t have too?

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Can't Help Others If Am Hurting In the Process

I’m gonna tell you my own experience with this because it’s an issue I still struggle with. For me, it’s because it’s easier, easier to be in control, it gives a sense of not having to feel disappointed.

 

I’m gonna tell you a recent story, that doesn’t have to do directly with being a StepMOM but directly correlates with the attitude I showed time and time again until I realized my behavior was harming me more so than those I was trying to help.

Who Is Blaming Who

My car tire’s needed to be checked, they didn’t have enough air, I didn’t want to take it into the shop, and had to go out of town, after that trip my tires were useless. I then had to take the car to the shop and was left without it for a week.

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In my mind, I partly blamed my husband, but the reality was that I was the only one to blame, because I knew what had to be done, but refused to do it. Now had this happen to my husband I would have tried to make it better, and been like o honey I should have reminded you to take your car to the shop while you were out of town, now we are down one car let me….fix it.

Don't Be A Martyr

A prime Stepmom example is when decisions get made without my input, I get angry with myself for not letting my voice be heard during certain occurrences, due to me trying to keep the peace for others. Later it takes a toll on my relationship with my husband. I all of a sudden try to be more active in decisions where in the past I said nothing. This throws him off because he now has to go back and make changes to something he thought was addressed.

 

What  I have learned is don’t become a martyr, let my voice be heard because when I do no only to I ruffle my own feathers, but my love ones too.