Hi lovely ladies,
As promised, here is part II of the blog on jealousy. See, jealousy is more often than not a two-way street - meaning you might have these feelings, but you’re probably not the only one who has them.
Empathy is a great way to put our feelings and circumstances in perspective. For example, we may think we’re the only one harboring this awful feeling of jealousy, but we usually don’t stop to think that the Bio Mama might have them too.
A blended family is a very delicate subject simply because there are more people involved than normal, even though everyone may have pure intentions, sometimes we have unresolved issues. For example, you may feel jealous about your husband still checking up on her house, even though you understand that he does it for the kids. She may be jealous thinking: “Why is he with her and not me?” “Why is he more willing to make that union work than he was with ours?”
Now, don’t get me wrong. I am not saying this is the reality of all blended families out there, but it is the reality for some, and we lose sight of that. The truth is, each of us has a method of coping with things, and we each have a unique path that we must go through. That path certainly becomes easier when we’re empathic to ourselves and others.
Maybe next time, the BioMOM tries to stir up some drama you will think twice before engaging in it because you are now aware that she may also be in pain. I am not saying it is your job to fix it. You can be kind enough and respectful to take it for what it is: an action by someone who is not in a great place at the moment.
Do you think you could have any other jealousy coping techniques other awesome stepmoms could benefit from?
Join my stepmom power group and share with all of them!